Being Rejected

Sorry for my absence. I have been mad at my IC, and I have (sadly) taken it out on the blog.

I recently received an e-mail and packet in the mail because I was a match for a leukemia patient needing a bone marrow transplant.  I was ecstatic   I have known people whose lives have been saved because of a transplant.  To know that I was a match was something special; it was a way for me to help someone.

I'll make the short story shorter: after filling out a brief health form, I was rejected because I have IC.  In their words, because of the unknown cause of interstitial cystitis as well as the lack of formal research, I could not be allowed to donate.  This rejection hurt more than I would have ever imagined.  I know having IC means that I can't eat normally.  I know having IC means intimacy is a pain it shouldn't be. I know that having IC means change after change in my daily lifestyle.  I did not know that having IC meant that I couldn't be a donor.  I did not know that IC meant that I couldn't save a life.  

Receiving the phone call was like someone looking at me and saying, "You are not healthy, and you are not enough."  Now the logical, smart part of myself knows that this is malarkey.  I am enough, and I try daily to be healthy- my healthy is just different than other people's.  

This experience has taught me a lot about having IC as well as what it means to help.  As a friend said, "It (IC) may be preventing you from this one opportunity, but there are SO MANY ways you can still serve people and ways that you'll be BETTER at serving people because of it"  I'm happy to say that after a week I can see that her words are incredibly true.  Having IC does not keep me from mentoring my sweet friend at a local elementary school.  Having IC does not keep me from counseling people through unexpected pregnancies.  Having IC does not keep me from serving my husband, loving my family, or being a devoted friend.  Having IC gives me perspective; it gives me an understanding of what struggling to be healthy feels like.  It gives me an understanding of having a condition that can't be seen.  It gives me an understanding of invisible pain.  It gives me an understanding that can help others struggling through similar situations.

So I leave you with this thought: IC, or any condition, can only limit you as much as you let it.  Sure there are bad days, days that are very hard to get through, but they are only days.  Recognize the condition, eat right, make smart choices, reduce stress, and most importantly live the life you were given.  Rock it and live it well, because you were placed on this Earth for a reason.  If you don't live your life, no one else will.